ETL to QE Update 38, I suck at making decisions and committing to them
Date: 2024-05-27
Looking in the mirror can be hard sometimes. Just like in Physics you need a reference point, or in this case, a reference set of values, in order to judge what you see in your reflection.
Coming up in three months ago I set myself the goal to finish a POC for QE(Question Engine) then get started on my Epic User Journeys dream project. This failure to get these tasks done does not look good in my ideological mirror, but at least I had a set of values to judge myself. At least I am learning to not be like Narcissus from The Alchemist who literally drowns when admiring his own beauty in a lake.
This making plans of plans and failing to follow through on them has happened a good dozen or more times in my life. Each time I feel sad and a sense of self loathing, but now it is time to synthesize those experiences.
It is my dream to become a competent software project manager. I want developers to be excited to take and do my tickets because they are so dam articulate. I need to start practicing what is required to become this person or it will never happen.
I have made a lot of attempts at building and describing what I currently label the Dentropy Daemon project including Dentropy Cloud, Algorithmic Reflection, Semantic Forum, Mimetic File System, Question Engine, Context Feed, Tulpa Manager, Social Media Singularity, Context Graph File System and The Ultimate Tagging Machine all in a vain attempt to build a Memex.
When exploring each of those ideas I function as a lost child wondering around. As a LARPing Wordcel all those attempts may sound pretty but they lack the constraints and reference points required to make them a reality. For example I have yet to write a proper Heilmeier Catechism for any of those projects that I felt was written well enough to get feedback from peers and people of competence. I just just keep cultivating my Shiny object syndrome and I don't even have a nice blog(web log) articulating what I have been up to except what you are looking at write here.
As I have said before, I have all the pieces, I just need to start putting them together and Complicated systems do not allow for simple decisions.